Monday, June 20, 2016

I've still been struggling

Living with a mental illness is not easy. I have been struggling so much over the past few months it is not funny. I try to tell myself every day "It is a new day, do not waste today. You can do anything you put your mind to. Don't listen to the voices they have no idea what they are talking about."

But I am so tired of struggling. Again I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. I no longer feel like myself. I feel like a stranger and I am just going through the motions of life. Like it is not me. I want to be ok. I want to do the things I use to do. I want to be a better mama for my children, a better wife, a better fur mama to my doggie. I just want to finally feel better feel like myself. I can not tell you the last time I felt like myself.

I do not know how to get back to old myself. My old self who just loved life and loved to do things. The girl who would not just sit and watch TV all day, would go out and do something anything. I feel like my kids are losing out because I do not want to do anything. To me they are suffering. They deserve so much better. They deserve the Mama I used to be. But how do I get back to that?

Tomorrow is Monday June 20, 2016 my Brucee's 5th Birthday. I am going to try my best to get out of my funk. My family deserves so much better. I know I have to do a little at a time. It is not going to happen overnight. But baby steps right?

Thanks for stopping by today my Sparkly Friends! Let's have a great week and take it a day at a time.....

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